Where are my ruby slippers?

OMG people are such a source of amusement some days. I couldn't make this kinda stuff up. Honest!

One night What'sHisName was getting ready for work in his usual 'uniform': tan slacks, t-shirt, blue shirt, jacket, but... he still had his sheepskin slippers on.

A quick glance at the clock confirmed he still had a while to go before leaving soooo... no problem. Yet. Now, mind you, he had to take the slippers off to get dressed. He had his work socks on.

Forty-five minutes later, he gets up to leave for work, picks up his lunch cooler and opens the door. I look down... yep. They're still there.

"Umm... wait," I said.

"What?!" He huffs loudly, rolling his eyes, adopting a teenage pose of impudence.

Oh gee, he's so nice when I'm being helpful. I almost let him go. I woulda loved to have heard what they said at work when he's walking around with his silly sheepskin slippers... the ones with the tuft of sheepskin at the heel that look completely dorky because they're too big and he walks like a duck while wearing them. I've never liked that pair.

I pointed down to his feet.

"What??" He huffs again, clearly impatient.

"Look down."

"What?!!"

"Really... LOOK at your FEET. Are you going to wear your SLIPPERS to work??"

The look on his face was priceless.

(BTW my winter slippers are huge fuzzy stuffed reindeer heads with bells on the antlers. The cats chase me around the house trying to catch them. The really nice thing about all that racket is I'll never exit the house with those on, no way! *grin*)

Just a Few of My Favorite Things

This morning while checking the mail, retrieving the now-empty trashcan, and herding the cats I had these rambling thoughts about some of my favorite things, things that make me smile. I just never put mine into my blog rambles, so here goes to a few of mine… the list changes all the time, too, one never knows what will bring a smile any given day:

...an unexpected card in the mail from someone very dear (not just on Christmas)

...the smell of apple pies baking (hey – that’s today!)

...good friends (every day)

...that look that one of my cats gives me that says “thank you for rescuing me, I really like it here, I really like you, and I promise I’ll try to not hock up a hairball on the carpet again” (I don’t actually believe they mean that last part, but they try)

...working out a new book and realizing that wild nutty idea I had just might work after all

...finding a new flavor of ice cream (it’s a whole food group you know, hahah), currently my two favorites are “fried ice cream” and “banana split” from Walmart’s house brand – they’re terribly nummy – even their-fat free or lowfat ones are pretty darn good for what they are

...sunflowers

...discovering that just when I need it most, that item I just ran out of and need on an emergency basis is now on sale for a bargain (that happens too much to be coincidence, I like to think my Guardian Angel of All-Things-Domestic had a hand in that)

...Yahoo Messenger's synchronized video sharing, I love watching and listening to music and video with friends far away

...discovering a new author then realizing he/she has a ton of books out there already, and then acquiring their backlist

...finding one of my cats sleeping on the pillow under my desk all day, just to keep me company cuz I seem blue that day (Munch has been doing this for a week, she can’t be cold – so I figure she just likes the pillow, my desk, or my company perhaps… it’s a big enough house she could sleep elsewhere but she lurks nearby when I’m feeling a tad off)

...realizing that I have friends who will always be my friends, no matter how 'up' and nutty I get, no matter how down I get, and no matter how much I need to vent about my personal life – because I’d return the favor in a heartbeat many times over

Enough with the sappy warm-fuzzies, I’ll stop now, hehehe.

Happy Holidays!
-Susan

Don't knock fish tacos...

Gonna indulge in another passion of mine… making up recipes. Want to make some killer homemade fish tacos? Don't knock them till ya try them; if you've never had a fish taco, it's a great treat, not fishy at all.

Read on…

You’ll need…

4-6 decent-sized pickled green jalapenos, seeded, de-veined, etc., chopped fine

3-4 Roma tomatoes, remove the guts and chopped fine

1 small-medium sweet onion, peeled, chopped fine

1 bunch fresh cilantro, chopped fine, remove as many of the stems as you can, but you can leave a lot of stems in there

Juice from 1 lemon or a couple limes, or combo of both

Salt and pepper to taste

Sour cream

Olive oil

At least a couple white fish filets (like tilapia (what I used), mahi mahi, cod, roughy, etc.)

1 egg, beaten (start with just one at a time, it doesn’t take much)

Bread crumbs (if you don’t have pre-made kind, make your own)

Corn tortillas (probably 4-6 for 2 fish fillets, depends on size of fillets)

Cabbage or lettuce, shredded fine

Shredded cheese (I used the pre-shredded taco cheese blend, but just cheddar or just Monterey Jack or a combo of those would be fine too)

Here’s what you do… it takes a few minutes but worth all those messy dishes too:

For the salsa, mix the jalapenos, tomatoes, onion, cilantro, and lemon/lime juice. Add whatever salt and pepper you wish here. Set aside for a while, you need the flavors to bloom a bit. You won’t need the sour cream till later, leave it in the fridge for now.

In a big pan with a lid, put a little olive oil (maybe 1/8” to 1/4” deep in a pan), soften the corn tortillas so you can fold them in half – either continue to fry them till they’re crispy, or remove to paper-towel-lined plate and let them cool a tad. Yes, I said tad, hehehe, isn’t that a cooking term? I like them crispy, then after they’re cooled a tad (there’s that word again, it’s just up from a smidge and down from a lot) I split them open and lay them flat on a plate but some people like them just softened – your preference there.

Cut the fish fillets in half if they’re really wide and thick, they’ll cook more evenly. Besides, it doesn’t take but a small piece (about four inches long) for a corn tortilla, and you don’t want them too wide so cut them down to what you want first. Muck them around in the beaten egg then roll them through the bread crumbs – I like to do that step twice so they’re double-coated, woohoo! Fry them gently for a few minutes each side in the olive oil. Watch it, don’t overcook them, there’s nothing worse than overcooked fish. Ewwww. Helps to have the oil not so hot, either. Otherwise you’ll have a splattery mess on the stovetop. A lid helps steam and evenly cook the fish - you can flip them after a minute, they should be done very quickly, test with a fork in the thickest spots..

If you have a cat herd like I do, this is the point where you’ll have to sacrifice a small piece of the fish to each cat. Fortunately only 2 of mine are actual kitchen beggars, but they all smelled the fish and just had to join in the melee when they heard the 2 sobbing pitifully.

After you do the required sacrifice of the small fish tidbits and shoo the cats out of the kitchen for the eleventh time, and while the fish for YOU is gently cooking (keep an eye on it), take out the sour cream from the fridge and get another bowl. Put a couple big spoonfuls of sour cream in it, then a couple big spoonfuls of that salsa mess that’s been sitting and blooming. Only mix as much sour cream and salsa mess as you want to eat just then – the rest of the salsa mess can be refrigerated for days but you don’t wanna have it mixed with sour cream while it sits like that, it’ll get ooky. Yes, ooky’s a cooking term too. Just up a smidge up from grodie and down a tad from icky.

The fish should be done about now, take them out of the oil if they are. Fish frying requires lots of monitoring, don’t let that part get away from you so keep an eye on the fish tidbits in the oil.

Get the cheese out and brace yourself… assembly time coming up.

On a clean plate (You don’t think I’d actually say “on a dirty plate” did you? HA!), layer a tortilla with a spoonful of the salsa/sour cream mix, then plop a piece or two of the fish on top of that, add a little cabbage/lettuce shreds, and then sprinkle on some cheese.

Make a second one if you think you have room for it. Go eat before the fish cools off, it’s tasty. Works really well with grilled mahi mahi too, but I didn't have the impetus to grill the tilapia today so they were olive-oil lightly breaded and pan-fried. Mmm... mmmm... mmmmm...

Guess what I had for lunch? LOL!

Enjoy!

Warm fuzzies...

Cats, cats, cats. Great pets, cats. Although if you're allergic - no. Otherwise - yes. I had some rambling thoughts about cats... since I have five (CATS, not thoughts, reallllly what're YOU thinkin'?), that's not too hard to do.

One day I read that some smarty research person somewhere said cats have the average IQ of a three-year-old human. Forgot where I read that, I have a memory like a steel sieve: some days, not a lot stays behind. LOL!

I don't really agree with that whole IQ-of-a-three-year-old thing, because for one thing I've seen some terribly smart three-year-olds, plus with my five furballs, it's more like five- or six-year-olds. Maybe even seven-year-olds on a good day. They just like to hide their smarts to get us to do their evil furry bidding, LOL! I'm not bragging on how their brains might be more developed than the average feline - don't get me wrong, one of them still has the nickname 'Numbskull' and the other 'Idiot', but that's a whole other story. Good cats, but dumber than a box of socks some days.

Then my mom told me something funny recently - cats used to be worshipped as gods, and they've never quite forgotten that. Now ain't (yes I said "ain't") THAT the truth?

The way I see it is that they only LET ME live here out of the graciousness of their feline hearts. I maintain the living quarters and lifestyle just for them, supporting their need for constant supply of food, water, catnip, edible cat grass, litterbox maintenance, toys toys and more toys, and not to mention the endless need for attention when they're not sleeping off that latest food-, sun- or catnip-induced-coma.

Plus, whoever said cats are independent hasn't seen my herd. Since I'm home so much, I think they've somehow mentally bonded to me in a weird way. They tag-team me so I'm never alone. And I do mean... NEVER. Not in the yard, the garage, the bed, the kitchen... even the shower is not off-limits to them. Yes... I said the shower. I have one cat that likes to climb in!! She likes to watch from between the two curtains usually - a clear plastic liner on the inside and a fabric one on the outside means she has a neat little area on the rim of the tub where she can experience the shower without getting completely wet every time. However, she will climb in while the shower's going, she's done it before but lately she's gone for the Rim With A View.

Anyhow, they're not independent, no way. They're far too needy to be independent. If I get something to eat, at least two of them need to also. If I have a drink, another one needs one too (not from what I'm drinking or eating, they just make sure that I notice they're getting a drink at the cat fountain at the same time as I drink my coffee or tea, that's what I meant). Then if I nap, they nap with me... usually in pairs and usually on my lap or by my feet. If I walk to the door, two or three have to perform Feline Escort Duty so I can't escape. If I go down the hall to the bathroom, at least one has to follow... perhaps to make sure I don't fall in. Although what they're going to do if THAT happens I don't know, but there you are. Maybe if I did fall in, they'd have some sort of Feline SOS thing going, or they've learned how to hit 9-1-1. Anyhow, I'm constantly monitored by some furry beast.

Whoever thought aliens from another planet were set to invade and take over planet Earth never probably thought that we already HAVE BEEN invaded... by CATS!!! They're everywhere. Have been for thousands of years too.

They're great company, don't get me wrong, I'd never change a thing. They can sense when I'm happy or sad, they're a big comfort when I'm ill, even if they can't fix me some chicken soup or run to the store for more ginger ale. They keep me company 24/7 whether I want them to or not, something I've grown quite accustomed to now and enjoy it. They like to watch TV with me, and sometimes I think they even know what I'm thinking. It's fun to make them toys from a piece of wadded up paper, or an old tube sock tied with a pinch of catnip inside. They do miss me when I'm gone and they greet me enthusiastically when I come back, not to mention they royally freak out when the luggage appears, signaling the imminent event of "Mom's Leaving". If I'm gone for a week, they are terribly funny when I get back... and somehow that's where I know the saying of getting a "warm fuzzy" must have come from. I get a lot of warm fuzzies some days, whether I want them or not they're there and that's that.

Still don't think they're three-year-olds though. Give them the benefit of a doubt and at least say they're First Graders, LOL! Very not-independent god-complex First Graders. hehehe!!

Have a warm fuzzy day!

What's that smell...

Well... I gotta rant about forwarding emails.

Not the nice ones with pretty pictures, super-funny cartoons, cute animal pictures, amazing magic tricks, or unusual YouTube clips that are worth watching... I got my knickers in a twist about forwarding urban legends. Myths. Folklore. Miscellaneous hoo-haw that's really unbelievable in the first place... but still, they get forwarded A LOT!

You know the ones... the ones where most sane people would say before they forward "Oohhh maybe I should check this out before I look like a complete donkey's-tushy and send this to my entire email list...":

- tape a penny to a bee sting to ease the pain! (Maybe if the penny was frozen first... but who keeps their pennies in the freezer for that kind of emergency?! Use ice, vinegar, paste of baking soda, etc...)

- gas pumps are cheating you! (Well we all KNOW that the price is up there, but really, they're not mis-calibrated or cheating you out of gallons of gas on every fill-up. *sigh*)

- forward this email to all your friends and Bill Gates will send a dollar for each email address! (Like a multi-billionaire has any way to do THAT... yeah... pull the other one.)

- dial #77 on your cell phone to connect to local highway patrol! (Don't they know how to dial 911?)

- new dollar coin has no "In God We Trust" phrase! (Umm... yes it does!! On the edge, hehehe. I can't wait to see one, bet they look very cool.)

- hop on one foot and swing a dead cat (hey!) over your head three times under the first full moon in the Spring and all your warts will drop off the next day! (I'm so not making that up! Thankfully I only have received THAT one once, and I'm sure the person sending it knew it had to be a joke... but then... it WAS on April 1st, hmmm...)

And the one I hadn't seen before this morning is :

- for less than 2 bucks you can spray a cheap mouthwash (like Listerine) around your yard and all your mosquitoes will drop dead!!

GIMME A BREAK! That Listerine trick doesn't work, you can do a search on Snopes.com and read all about it. I love that site, they have EVERY urban myth and legend and whether it's remotely true or not, and all the details about anything you'd ever wanna know. Good site to have handy. And no, I'm not making a buck off promoting them, I'm just ranting about the Listerine myth. I'm in a mood, sue me.

There's this one friend that emailed me this urban myth this morning, so before I went to tell all my friends about it too, I checked it out. It's false of course. Use DEET stuff, that's what works on mosquitoes.

Around here we remove any standing water pockets in the yard, it's a mandatory thing for this area to keep them from breeding. We don't have it so bad here, but I know there are areas where they are major nuisances so I can imagine some people will try anything. But Listerine? The yard would sure have a unique aroma... bet the mosquitoes would love the minty-fresh breath before they stung ya too.

Sooo... back to the email. I thought I'd be a pal and just let her know nicely before she goes and wastes her time spraying her yard with mouthwash, and I sent her the link for Snopes page, just as a "by the way read this before you try it" kinda thing. It was a harmless thing, just a let-ya-know deal. *grin*

Her reply to me was very negative and very rude! Surprised me, too. Hey, most people just say thanks for pointing out an urban legend they didn't know about, they don't trash the sender. I didn't even start the thing! LOL!! A lot of people are taken in by the rumor emails that get started and then NEVER STOP. It's nice to nip one in the bud here and there - just so all of our collective email systems don't get bogged down with yet another rumor mill circulating in email.

So...

Please, for the love of God, take a second to look stuff up before you forward it. If it sounds too good to be true, it usually is.

And for Pete's sake, I won't get a hundred years of bad luck for NOT forwarding the other stuff either (but that's another blog for another day hehehe!!). *grin*

How did THAT end up in the cart?

Good grief, someone just shoot me. Well not REALLY! Put the gun away, it's just a figure of speech, golly.

You see... I went grocery shopping yesterday.

Oh but wait, that's not the whole story. (It never is, in my blogs, hahahah...)

I went grocery shopping on a Sunday afternoon, when everyone and their dog (really!) was at the Super Wal-Mart. Passed a lady with a guide-dog-in-training, so... it really WAS everyone and their dog, hehehe.

Oh but wait, it gets a wee bit worse.

I went grocery shopping on a Sunday afternoon BEFORE I had anything to eat.

Big huge OOOOOOOOOOOPS.

So there I was, resting after the ordeal, and wondering what exactly possessed me when I walked through the deli and the bread sections on an empty stomach. Carb heaven, here we come!

There should be a sign at the end of those aisles that says, "If you haven't eaten in the last four hours, do not enter."

Stuff landed in the cart without me even asking it to hop in! It was almost like shopping with hubby - stuff just mysteriously appeared in the cart. After wandering the Super Wally World for an hour, my feet were saying to my brain "Just take it! It's screaming your name! You want it, really you do!" And the worse inner comment: "There's room in the cart still!"

Did I really need two packages of whole wheat hamburger buns? Well, they WERE on sale. And they'll be used, no doubt... because I loaded up on sliced meats and cheeses too.

Did hubby really need two loaves of nine grain bread for sandwiches, when just one would do? Hey, they were on sale too, such a deal. And he does love his tuna salad.

Did we really need two packages of five-count butter croissants? Not on sale, but they will make absolutely fabulous turkey and swiss sandwiches.

There's a problem with grocery shopping for me though and I'm fully aware of it: if I don't eat, I come back with just about everything we ever needed and THEN some. But on the other side of the coin, if I eat before I go, then I come back with one bag of vegetables and some lettuce. AND NOTHING ELSE! Good grief, we can't live on that for a week!

Now where am I going to put all this STUFF...???

The joy of pets

Eeeeeeks, I shrieked!

There I was typing furiously on my story and hubby walks in. I was hip-deep in some really good scene and I got interrupted. It happens a lot! I put a mirror on the corner of the monitor that shows the doorway behind me but I was on a roll and frankly... he walks like a cat. He likes to sneak up behind me and read over my shoulder (ooo that's a pet peeve of mine, you'd think he'd stop but noooOOOoooooOOOoooo... eh, story for another day, LOL!!)

Apparently he thought I needed more blog material or something. So… herewego.

He delivered this announcement with just a bit of dread and morbid disgust:

"Tigger just barfed by the bed."

Then he stood there… just looking at me.
He. Just. Stood. There.

Well hold me back, stop the presses... does that mean... oh say it isn't so!! Does that mean I get to clean it up? Good golly, Miss Molly... and here I thought I was going to be able to eat din-din without feeling queasy from cleaning up a catmess.

There went that notion. Guess din-din's gonna have to wait till I get disinfected, too, hehehe.

And since when did he forget how to use a paper towels and Oxy-Clean (Ooooo if you have cats or dogs, this stuff is marvy on carpeting!)? We've had five cats for a while - it's not like catmess is a new idea around here.

I sooooo wish it was! We clean the carpets and feed them Furball-B-Gone regularly… if you have a cat, let alone more than just "*A* cat", you're going to get to play rug-spot-fixer at least once a week, if not more. Catmess happens.

So... feeling much like the big bad wolf out to lynch me a cat and a hubby all at once, I huffed and I puffed, and I got out the cleaning stuff (hey that rhymed! cool!), and I marched down the hall to see...

...the tiniest little spot of catmess that I've ever seen. I squinted, looked around, yep – hubby-dearling was pointing at that miniscule spot.

I'm not going to get graphic, but usually a catmess is quite... umm... artistic.

Me, looking around for more spots: "This is IT?"
Him, hedging his bets: "Well, there was that too."
He pointed to a spot some five feet away - far too distant to be from the same umm... errr... projectilation. (That's a word, isn't it? My spellchecker thinks not, but I think it is.)

Me: "That's not recent, that was Tigger couple days ago, darnitall. I'll go over it again."
Apparently the older spot came back up, so I hit it again with the Oxy-Clean right after hitting the new spot.

Out, darn spot, out!

Of course, hubby had to watch me closely, thankyouverylittleforhelpingsheesh!
Tigger had long since vanished. Probably hiding... again. The cat's a woos. Or is that wuss? Yeah... wuss.

Poor Tigger, she gets so stressed sometimes. It'd be nice if she didn't make a catmess right where we either A) need to walk in the dark barefooted, or B) next to someone trying to sleep. Perhaps one of these days she'll aim at the linoleum or wood floor so it's ta-da (drum-roll-please) far easier to clean! Like that'll ever happen.

Don’t get me wrong, I love my kitties though… and I know if we didn’t have cats, we’d have dogs. Or a combo of the two, maybe a house rabbit again - I used to raise those years ago. We just love our pets.